Week 17 Update

I can’t believe it has been 17 weeks and only one more day to go till JUDGEMENT DAY. I have to admit I have been mired in a bit of misery like George Constanza on Seinfeld this past week because I have been eating like a rabbit on a diet. All I can see is yummy carbs everywhere; even black licorice looks delish right about now.

Flushing and Peaking
My ultimate goal is to look my leanest and most muscular on Monday. So, in order to do that, I have been drinking a gallon of H2O and consuming no starchy carbs and no salt since Tuesday. Why? Well, my friend, I will tell you why. It is not that I am extra thirsty or that I have become a carbaphobe. The reason I have deluged my body is to put my system in flush mode. When you carouse excess amounts of water like it’s your favorite booze, your body makes a big effort to get rid of the excess water coming in–I have been going to the bathroom every 30 minutes for the past 4 days. I still have another day of flushing till Saturday night. What is Saturday night? I am glad you asked.

Saturday night is when I channel my inner-Kobayashi and pig out on all the carby Korean food I can get my little grubby hands on during my pop’s Father’s Day dinner. In conjunction, I will be drink no water. This will accomplish two things: 1) I will continue to visit the latrine because I will still be in flushing mode; 2) my consumption of starchy carbs will divert any of the remaining fluid in my body to my muscle cells creating a leaner, more vascular look. This, in turn, will result in me winning my free sushi dinner at Chiyo Sushi and representing all the over 40 year-olds out there.

This process of no water and carb-up, called Peaking, is what models and bodybuilders go through in preparation for photo shoots and bodybuilding competitions. Not the funnest thing in the world, but it works wonders to create the super-lean look typically associated with a six-pack. More common tricks of the trade that models and bodybuilders use are fat-burners, diuretics, and appetite suppressants. Of course, I would not resort to such shenanigans; Abe Lincoln would not like that. And how could I disappoint honest Abe?

Here are my photos two days apart. Check ’em out: